Welcome to Wellness Weekly coming to you every Wednesday. This will be a weekly series, sort of like a Letter from the Editors that will rotate between Morgan, Lara and Luigi with the occasional guest. We'll hold space on the Dirt to check-in on our Sixth Sense: the term we use to refer to our spirit, our intuition, our inner power. And because while we exist in the world alongside our other Five Senses, we'll do a check-in of those, too.
Last week, I could feel myself slipping into what I thought was a nasty cold and sinus infection. After a few tests, it was confirmed - I had Covid. Luckily am fully vaccinated, and the while symptoms I experienced were rough, but by the 4th day and 19th Marvel movie, I was beginning to feel like I was turning a corner. Fear not! My experience wasn't a lonely one! I had the company of my recently covid-recovered fiancé and boyfriend, along with daily check-ins from my loved ones. Lara was even kind/crazy enough to deliver the most beautiful non-smell/taste gift in the form of an Agave plant. But my inability to distract myself without the goings-on of my former routine did cause me to *literally* pause and reflect on some things.
See, slowing down isn't really my thing. It's my most "Capricorn" trait by far. In therapy, I've been talking about needing to slow down, process, and reassess various patterns and facets of my life through the lens of compassion. Well, I got the pause I was asking for! It was a perfect example of universal balance -- when you don't take that time to stop, The Universe does it for you.
As I was frozen in the quarantine timeline, a clear and undeniable message came through: Rest and allow yourself to heal, and when you return, continue the work. "The Work" I'm referring to is the excavation of that deep, sticky, sometimes shameful, dimply lit part of your brain closet where you hide things. Work that I've been spending the better part of this year doing. For me, and I assume some of you, a lot of it involves my past and specifically my family. Since early adulthood, my relationship with them has been pretty strained. It turns out growing up in a Catholic cult does affect you! A few visits a year turned into a few texts a year, which turned into radio silence and what I thought was freedom. Only to realize I was simply shoving them further back in my brain closet.
And so, with this new month, a healthy body, and the lens of Smudge's theme, I'm committing to shining more light on those dark corners. To continuing to be vulnerable and raw, even if it's a little painful and messy. I think I'll start with a text to my mom:
"Hi, Mom. How's Hawaii? I've been meaning to text you. I'd like to get together to talk when you're back."
While I was sick, I devoured the book "Crying in H-Mart". The Author, Michelle Zauner, does an incredible job honoring herself, her mother, and the Asian American experience through her storytelling. So much of her fondest memories tie back to food, which spoke to me very deeply as someone who comes from a culture where food is love.
Lorde released her provocatively subdued new album, Solar Power. Listening to it feels like going on a sun-soaked Esalen retreat with Natalie Imbruglia on shrooms. It's perfect and I'll fight anyone that says otherwise.
Well this one is an interesting one seeing as how I didn't have this sense for the majority of last week. The first thing I was (sort of) able to taste was Hot Cheetos. My fingers are still stained red.
Again, an interesting one, given the circumstances. Upon recommendation from my friend who had Covid, I used essential oils to test my smelling capabilities every day. I stopped just short of pouring them into my nostrils to see if I could detect the smell of lavender, eucalyptus, and orange. Eventually, I could decipher some notes, but I'm still not convinced my sense of smell has fully returned.
Being in captivity meant I was back on my yoga mat. When I could muster up enough energy, I returned to Jason Crandell's class on Glo. I even re-instated my Glo membership because I just needed to move. Lifehack: turn your space heater on, and it's like you're in a hot yoga studio!